Monday, March 11, 2013

God's Breaking Our Hearts... More!

Well, God's been breaking our hearts more lately. (in a good way) God has been speaking to us about our parameters we were “requesting” in a child. Our home study had approved us for up to 2 children 0-4 years old. When we first started the process we wanted a girl 0-6 months old & healthy. Then as we went on we felt God leading us to open up to the possibility of a “minor” special need & up to 12 months. Then as we were going through our home study we started looking into adopting a child with HIV. We were also considering the option of a twin or sibling up to 3. When we completed our home study, this was pretty much our decision was one child 0-12 months old boy or girl & were open to a twin or sibling 0-3 years old one or both with HIV. We knew that God ONLY wanted us to adopt a child with HIV & not a health child (unless they were a sibling). God really broke my heart for these children suffering this awful disease. There is NOT anything wrong with adopting a healthy child but we knew that was not God's calling for our family. Our motivation for adopting was not just to add another child to our family because we could do that the old fashion way if we wanted to. God was calling us to give a home to a child who needed a home. I constantly have the song “Kings & Queens” from Audio Adrenaline in my head. (check out a previous blog post for this video, it's awesome & so powerful) One of the lyrics in the song is “If not us, who will be like Jesus To the least of these, If not us tell me who will be like Jesus Like Jesus to the least of these.” This is playing in my head quite often. God kept telling me that he wanted more. He kept telling me we were too closed in our parameters. I felt as though we were saying that if we were to get a 3 year old sibling then they weren't as important or a priority as the baby. That we really wanted a baby but if we had to take a 3 year old also then we would. Now I know that's not the case & there would be nothing wrong with us wanting a baby, but again this is not what God wanted for US. This had been weighing on my heart & I brought it up to Jeremy the other day. I said that I felt as though we needed to open it up to a child or 2 siblings 0-4 years old. Thankfully he was in full agreement. We have officially notified our agency of this change.

With this change it could change our timeline which is both a positive & negative. Our agency has estimated 4-8 months for a referral. Although, there's a chance it could be much sooner if there would be a child or siblings that don't meet the parameters of the families above us on the list. We don't know everyone who's on the HIV list but based on those we know, for instance if there would be boy & girl 4 year old twins, there's no one we know of requesting this. It's really hard to know for sure how long it will be as they could receive several HIV+ referrals all together or could go months with none. With this possible earlier referral comes a LOT of money needed quickly. This is one thing I am worried about. If we received a call tomorrow we would not have the money to accept it. I am working hard to TRUST GOD on this! He has planned this whole adoption out long ago & we believe he will provide when the time is right.

We appreciate EVERYONE'S prayers & support through this adoption & ask you to continue praying for our family & our child(ren) who are far far away. Pray that God will watch over them when we can't be there to take care of them. Pray that they are receiving the medical care that they need to keep their HIV under control. Pray for those that are caring for them now whether it be their birth family or an orphanage.

Thank you!

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